Kansas City Chiefs Week 17 Post Game Press Conference

As Coach Dewser took the podium this afternoon his grin could be seen from the back of the room. The only question wondered was why? Was it because with their latest win the Chiefs secured the AFC West and home field advantage throughout the playoffs, or perhaps because of their victory this ensures that the hated Oakland Raiders and their one man show(RunDMC...or more aptly nickanmed as of late Run"after the catch" DMC). It turned out neither one of those was the case, "We escaped" claimed Coach D in his first address to the media all season, oddly enough.

Reporter Hoof: Coach, you escaped, but in all fairness why did you bench your starters in the first half, you still had something to play for.

Coach: Well Hoof, it's simple we wanted to avoid injuries for our core players, we knew Denver would play us hard, but our second stringers have been matching up against our first teamers all year in practice, we knew they could step up here so we could rest our players and look toward the playoffs.

RH: With all do respect Coach, and I did lead with "with all due respect" but what the hell were you thinking, that has got to be one of the worst coaching decisions ever.

Coach: Well Hoof, that is my decision to make, when you become and NFL head coach you will have that right as well. We made some adjustments at half after noticing how stagnant our offense was in the 1st half and came out strong. Luckily, as we have done all year, we jumped on Charles' back as he led us to the promise land. Denver played us tough, but a W is a W, and I will tell you this much we are really looking forward to this week off before gearing up for our divisional round match up.

RH: Anyone you would want to play in that round?

Coach: Well we are really hoping we draw the Raiders again, we feel we match up with them really well, stop McFadden beat the Raiders. However, not to sound cocky or anything, but I do not think the Raiders will make it past the Wild Card round.

RH: How can you say that...The Raiders are perhaps the most balanced team in the league with a run/pass game that ranked top ten in both aspects, you are a bias, ignorant SOB.

Coach: I knew you looked familiar...figured you would jump on that bandwagon.

RH: I don't know what your talking about?...

Coach: You are Coach Gordon's mustache, (the gentleman with the "bro-stach") wearing alter ego...This is just weird, how did you get here, didn't you just have a game to play?

RH: Umm...duh...That's besides the point, stop hating on my...I mean...his...I mean the Raiders....EHHHHH We are clearly superior players with a superior team and superior coaching...We will rape you if we play you again...

Coach: Can we have Coach Gordon removed from this press conference...it always gets weird when he is here...always talking about rape...See you next year Coach, we all know you are a classic one and done team.

I will say I made a coaching gaffe, clearly, in hindsight, it was a poor judgement for me to bench our starters, I would like to apologize to the players, staff, ownership and most importantly our fans. I know within the last few weeks I have made some dumb moves, my blunders vs. the Packers and this game most notably. I guarantee this will not happen in the postseason. Over the next two weeks we are going to go back to the basics, improve the pass game and sure up the defense. I know all these exhilarating OT wins have been great for ratings and fan morale, but they have been awful for my heart, they have me on edge more than i'd like. The AFC is tough, a lot of good teams, but if by chance we can make it to the Superbowl it's the truly dual threat teams that scare us. As far as who we would want to play if we made it that far...to me it is a no brainer...the Panthers. If we are going to be the best then we want to beat the best in the NFC, but we shall see.

I'd like to thank all of you for your time and we will talk again as our next game approaches. Thank you.

***Press Conference End*